Smiling Like a Butcher's Dog

It’s Sunday morning. My eyes are red. My head hurts. What’s left of my voice is hoarse and raspy. A rough Saturday night on the town? Sort of, but probably not in the way you’re thinking of. Last night, Zavo, our buddy Karasic and I were among the 17,000 plus fans lucky enough to attend the Penguins home opener.

Walking into the arena, I was struck by the number of fans wearing Penguins jerseys. Given the events of the last few months, this was one of the hottest tickets in all of sports. Deep down, I was worried that the Penguins games were gonna go NBA, and become a social status thing. You know the deal, people in the best seats who are only at the game because their company has season tickets. Even then, they’re more interested in being seen on television than in who’s playing. Good first returns on avoiding this in the arena this season.

(The best jersey of the night, by far, was a guy wearing Lemiuex’s Laval Voisins throwback from juniors. Great stuff.)

We got to our seats in E section about 45 minutes before game time. It was at an odd angle, but we had a pretty good view of the ice. A couple years ago, we had unknowingly bought partially obstructed view seats for a game against the Senators. You could see just enough of the ice to make out what was going on, but the scoreboard and the corners at the opposite end of the ice were completely blocked. Given how late we bought our tickets for last night’s game, I was pretty sure we were looking at a similar situation. Had this happened, there’s no doubt Sidney Crosby’s first NHL goal would have come from one of these corners.

The pre-game stuff was pretty cool. I generally have low expectations for these things, but I was pleased last night. There was a nice video montage of the Penguins history, buttressed around the idea of a grandfather relating the story to his grandson. I even got a little chill when the old guy wrapped up the video with “I have a feeling that the best part of this story is yet to come.” The moment was quickly broken by Karasic doing an impersonation of Mario Lemieux.

(Every opportunity we get, Karasic and I whip out the impersonation we do of Mario Lemieux. We get a kick out of the idea of this mild-mannered French Canadian bossing people around. Over the years, he’s kind of grown into this megalomaniacal asshole, only interested in telling people what to do. A couple of years ago, the team didn’t sign any players in the off-season, but instead brought in cheerleaders and a pre-game lights show. This can’t be done justice in print but the impersonation went something like this “Hey Craig, forget about…uh…resigning Kovy. I…uh…just want to make sure…uh…we have enough money for…uh…tits and lasers, eh.” It’s juvenile but even writing about it right now it cracks me up.)

Finally, at around 7:30 they dropped the puck. It was a crazy game, and there’s no way I could do it justice with a blow-by-blow account. Still, there are plenty of moments that will stick with me. Like…

…Being scared to death in the opening two minutes. Boston’s offense was flying and the home team looked tense and stiff. Had the Bruins scored that quickly it might have shot the Penguins confidence, and likely would have taken the crowd out of the game. Sebastian Caron didn’t make many good saves, but those two in the opening minute were huge. There was some serious blow-out potential.

…The number of penalties called on both sides. I know Gary Bettman was in attendance, but 16 total calls gives me hope they may be serious about cracking down on obstruction this time. I remember wincing through so many non-calls during the height of the trap era you’d have thought I had a twitch. If anything, last night they may have called too many pen—forget it, I’m not even gonna say it.

…Palffy breaking in all alone three minutes into the game. So often during the last two or three years, the Pens would have an odd man break and you’d start to get excited about. Then slowly you’d realize, about the time the shot sailed over the goal, that Matt Hussey isn’t exactly a “game breaker.” It was nice to realize it was Palffy on the break, and to top it off he absolutely buried the shot.

… The face Karasic made after the second period. At the intermission, we’d already seen two breakaways, 10 goals, 12 power plays and about 600 defensive break downs by the Penguins. He looked like he’d just gotten off a Zero-G flight. After about two minutes of dead silence he just mutters, “I can’t believe we have to go through this for twenty more minutes.”

…Lemieux. What more can be said about Le Magnifique? Every hockey fan should see him play in person once before they die. Even someone who’s never seen a hockey game before could tell he’s the best player on the ice. He’s everywhere, making tape-to-tape passes, breaking up an odd man rush, crashing the net at just the right time. It used to be Lemieux scored most of his goals by getting a step on his man and the taking it off to the races. Now he scores a lot of goals based on vision and pure hockey sense. Both lamps last night came on plays where he snuck in behind the defense, read the puck correctly and poked it into a wide open net

…Joe Thornton missing a wide open net during a 5-on-3 power play late in the first period. I mean he absolutely whiffed on the shot. This is memorable if only because it allowed me to taunt him for the rest of the power play. Every time Boston set-up I would scream “Give the puck to Thornton!” followed by a chorus of “shank, shank, shank…” whenever his teammates threw it his way. Again it’s not as funny in print, but it amused me at the time.

…The “Blue Line Band,” local musicians, who look like parents in a John Hughes movie, hired by the team to play music in between periods. If you want Pittsburgh’s cultural scene summed up, come take a look at these guys. They rattled out off-key versions of “Peg” “Domino” and “Superstition” (all released before 1980) to booming applause from the grateful crowd.

…Sidney Crosby. Wow. Talk about a flair for The Moment. A great beginning for the phenom from Cole Harbour, who got his first (of what should be several thousand) standing ovations from the home crowd last night. It’s funny though, it’s not the ovation or the pass he made to Brooks Orpik in the second period (that prompted Orpik to say “If I don’t bury that, I need to find a new career”), that I’ll remember most fondly. It’s not even his first NHL goal, which, for the record, happened right in front of us. Rather, it was his reaction to the goal that I’ll take away. As the goal light flashed Crosby skated backwards to the boards, completely in awe of the moment for a second, before letting out a high-pitched “Yeahhhhhhh!!!!” In that moment, he wasn’t “the next Gretzky” or “the Superstar” or “the Chosen One,” no, right then he was just an 18 year-old kid who scored a big goal.

….Not feeling safe at all with a 6-4 lead and thirteen minutes to play. The Penguins fired blanks on two power play opportunities to open the third period. As time expired on the second one, I remember thinking that they may have just blown the game. I guess when your defensive rotation includes Josef Melichar, Rob Scuderi and Steve Poapst (guys more suited for March of the Penguins than the Pittsburgh Penguins) you have every right to be afraid.

I have a confession. I’ll probably remember having my fears justified, and the Penguins blowing the lead, losing 7-6 in OT. When the Bruins scored the game winning goal, I was crushed. I cursed. I kicked my seat. I wanted to bolt from the arena as quickly as possible. Another Pittsburgh sports near miss, in a decade of near misses. I was even preparing to hash out an entry where I talked about the rotten luck Pittsburgh teams have had since the last Stanley Cup win in 1992. This game was going to buttress my argument.

But a funny thing happened when I woke up this morning. The loss didn’t sting as much anymore. All the storybook things that went right rushed through my head. Two goals for Lemieux. Three points, and a first NHL goal for Crosby. Palffy burying a breakaway. The return of Mark Recchi. It was a good night, no a great night, and one that an OT loss in the third game of the season can ruin.
Walking out of Mellon Arena last night, we spotted a couple walking side-by-side. She was in a Lemieux jersey and he was decked out in a #77 Ray Bourque jersey. It was pretty ironic given how often Lemieux had made Ray Bourque look like a turnstile throughout their respective careers. As the crowd got more congested, he stepped back and let his wife or girlfriend walk in front of him. Trudging towards the escalator, she remained a few paces ahead. Inspired, I called out “hey look, there’s something new, Lemieux’s got a step on Bourque!” I couldn’t have said that a year ago. A team that loses more than forty games and finishes with the lowest point total in the league doesn’t give you the right to say things like that. But last night, it was okay again. Win or lose, the Penguins were back.